I’ve been doing a lot of magic lately. Like a lot more than usual. In the morning I’ll record my dreams, meditate, maybe some tarot, make a sigil, do a pentagram or hexagram ritual, or read. But always record my dreams and meditate. In the evenings I’ve been reading and studying and doing rituals, exploring various facets of the spirit realm, burning some new incense, praying, and practicing gathering ritual supplies. I’ve been learning things through experience and knowledge. I’ve started to see how the pentagram and hexagrams work in their invoking and banishing phases, balancing out internal energies. This is new for me. Really digging into this and seeing how they work. Previously I’ve just done the LBRP because you were suppose to. Though I had experimented with the others. I’m learning how to interpret dreams from a mythological perspective and not an intellectual one. Personal mythology or deep, psychical psychology versus ancient myth and also not just taking a guess at what it might mean via the obvious. The steady drip of daily meditation is adding up and I’m learning about distractions and concentration. My posture, aided greatly by daily exercise – lost 20 lbs bitches! – has skyrocketed in improvement and some irks of posture are improving. I’m learning about sigils and what works and what doesn’t. This is a huge topic and ties in with meditation, self inquiry, and true self and true will. It’s better to do your true will but doing a ritual for something that’s going to happen anyway makes it so much better. I had zero success with finding a lost item that I probably didn’t need anyway. That I didn’t need it is an excuse and the fact still stands that it didn’t work. Though I used, for me, an innovative approach. I need to get better at doing rituals for things I’m going to do anyway. But, this is why I’m doing this stuff: to learn! I’ve got two new tarot decks, the Thoth and the borderless Smith-Waite deck. I haven’t opened the Thoth deck yet but I am loving the Smith-Waite. I love the artwork, the gentleness of it, and the borderless is an awesome feature. I’m waiting on the Thoth. I’ve heard it is an advanced deck and I’ve just gotten into the Golden Dawn, really studying and trying to learn correspondences and astrology, slowly. So I’m not quite ready for that yet. I have learned to incorporate planetary days and hours into spells and activities though. So I’m exploring that realm too. I’m not ready to talk about the spirit work I’ve been doing but I’ve been putting myself through rituals and attempting to allow my deeper mind to speak through and even if a spirit or whatnot doesn’t pop into physical appearance, speaking like the deity or honored deceased or quasi fictional character (*ahem* Merlin – I’m a chaos magician, what) is actually listening. I try to respect them and listen to hear what they may have to say. Even though I’ve been involved with magic for a long time I’m trying some things for the first time and trying old things with a brand new attitude. I’m also learning that ritual invocations are an amazing way for me to get into some seriously deep meditation territory. That was something I did not expect. I expected visions and great dreams and synchronicities galore. But I’m learning something about myself, learning to accept and to appreciate. The depth states (technically stages, of insight) I’m coming to learn to appreciate. I don’t think it’s something a lot of people have and they whole reason I wanted them was to impress people. Which is really fucking stupid. So I thank the Gods for their lessons.
So what’s the big change? I’ll have to get all personal about that next time.
Until then, keep up your practice!